You cannot love in a healthy way unless you love yourself first. In addition, self-love will help you to establish stronger boundaries in relationships, to protect yourself and to find the courage to abandon any relationship that does not suit you.

Along with these promises, I also made the decision to create something different in my love life. I wanted to create a healthy and happy relationship, contrary to what my parents had and the ones I had in the past.

To do this, I needed to become someone different. Not a different person, but to become more courageous and authentic in my relationships. Otherwise, what is the point?

I needed to start talking, expressing my feelings and asking for what I wanted. I just needed to become more vulnerable in my relationships.

First, I took a break from dating and focused on making myself happier and stronger.

Second, when I met the right person, I had some new rules to help me and stay strong in the relationship. I didn’t want to lose myself in a relationship again.

Because, to be honest, losing yourself is much more painful than losing a relationship. And it will take forever to find your strength, dignity and your truth again.

Here are some things I did differently, before and after entering a new relationship, that you can also do to make sure you don’t get lost.

We get lost in relationships because we don’t feel worthy of love and our limits are weak. When you love yourself, you know how you want to feel and be in your next relationship.

You also set healthy boundaries, which prevent you from losing your identity in a relationship.

How do you start to love yourself? Here are three tips that you can implement right now.

When you begin to follow the path of self-love, you will begin to appear differently in your life and in your relationships.

Know your needs. Know your desires. Know your dreams. Know your values. Know your priorities. Know yourself, basically.

This knowledge will prevent you from overcommitting yourself in a relationship. Your strong sense of identity will help you to keep what is really important to you.

This will give you a sense of security, which comes from within and not from your relationship.

I have two small exercises that will help you to know and better understand yourself and your needs.

1. Create a list of your current needs. Take a piece of paper and create four columns. Title each column: emotional, mental, physical and spiritual. Take your time and explore what you need in these four categories to feel fulfilled.

2. Write down your top five or ten top priorities. These are the things that are important to you and that you would like to focus on now. List them in order of importance.

These exercises will give you a stronger direction in life and help you explore what is really important to you. It makes sense to revisit them occasionally, as things are likely to change over time.